


Unwilling to Let Go

by Mrs_SimonTam_PHD



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Angst, Cycle of Abuse, Escaping from Abuse, Fear, Healing, M/M, NDAs are Found, Stalking, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:47:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26325133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD/pseuds/Mrs_SimonTam_PHD
Summary: Lucifer is trying to move on from his abusive ex. His ex is unwilling to let Lucifer go.
Relationships: Asmodeus/Lucifer (Supernatural)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Unwilling to Let Go

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I wrote this, I just had the idea and I wrote it.

Lucifer flinched as someone raised a hand, startled when it came to a rest on his shoulder. 

“Who hurt you like this?” 

“A man that I used to love,” Lucifer said softly. “Someone who broke me into nothing, all because he could. 

He never gave his name. The only person who knew his name was his therapist. 

That was the price for being left (mostly) alone. He was never to utter who abused him and used him. It was a powerful man, someone who could easily make Lucifer disappear. 

When Michael came to visit, he noticed the three locks on his brother’s front door, and the deadbolt on the bedroom door. He saw the positive affirmation signs all over the house and the rigid schedule, kept on the fridge and updated daily. When he asked about these new changes to Lucifer’s life, his brother laughed and shrugged it off. 

“It just helps me stay focused,” he said. “And it helps with the burnout.” 

Michael knew better, however. He had suspicions of abuse and who Lucifer’s ex was, but he kept his mouth shut on the matter. If Lucifer needed him, he knew Michael’s number. 

It still scared Michael every time he heard the code for a domestic assault or an aggravated assault come through dispatch, not wanting to hear the address that could be Lucifer’s. He prayed that he would never have to respond to that call. 

_ Good little kitten. No one is to know about me.  _

_ I know.  _

_ Yes you do, and if you ever tell, I’ll make sure that no one finds you.  _

_ I know. No one will know, and I’ll never tell.  _

_ Now, stay a good little kitten, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow.  _

_ Good night. Sleep well.  _

_ Sleep well, little kitten.  _

Lucifer wasn’t sure how many times that he had to tell the nursing staff at doctor’s offices and hospitals that he had to be restrained whenever they used needles on him, whatever the reason was. It didn’t matter to them, thinking he was joking, until they brought out the needle and his flight or fight response kicked in, followed by a panic attack. He couldn’t wait to get over that block, he just wished that his needle phobia was taken more seriously. 

“You’ve got a lot of scars,” his conquest  _ du noir  _ noted, tracing them. 

“Thanks, it was a buy one get two free deal,” Lucifer joked, staring at them himself. “They’re from a life I wish I could forget about.” 

His date nodded, still tracing them with his fingers. “They weren’t put here by force, were they?” he asked. 

Lucifer exhaled. “They were,” he admitted. “Punishments, you know.” 

His date shifted. “I’m sorry,” he said, “no one deserves that.” 

“Yeah,” Lucifer agreed, not believing it. 

“How’d you get away from them?” the other man asked. 

“I sold my soul to the devil,” Lucifer replied, wondering if his ex made or had a copy of the NDA. 

“You got away, no matter how,” his date hummed. “Round four?” 

Lucifer laughed and rolled on top of his date. “Let’s get to work.” 

For every special occasion, Lucifer received flowers. His birthday, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, the first day of Pride, and their anniversary, he got flowers. Forget me nots, green carnations, and red roses with some baby’s breath. Every time, it came with a card. “For my kitten, may he remember the good and forget the bad.” 

There was always speculation on who they were from, and Lucifer let his coworkers gossip as each new bouquet filled him with fear. 

_ It wasn’t so bad, Lucifer. I could’ve been worse. Come home, please.  _

_ It wasn’t working. I wasn’t happy. Please respect that.  _

_ You’re never satisfied with anything, kitten. You need to be home, and soon.  _

_ Not right now. I’ve got an early meeting tomorrow.  _

_ Sleep well, kitten. Dream of me.  _

Lucifer knew that he was being tailed, his every movement tracked by people on his ex’s payroll. He would do his best to lose them every day. Some days, he lost them. Other days, he bribed them. Other days, neither losing them or bribing them could get them away from him.

He turned it into a game, and he would call his ex to tease him about how bad the tail was that day. 

_ Don’t be a brat, Lucifer,  _ his ex would say, but Lucifer didn’t care. It felt empowering to be a brat and not be punished for it. He was sassy, to do it with impunity was even better. 

He hated to be punished for being him. 

“You’re improving every time I see you,” Garth told him one day, “even on the days that you’ve fallen back into old habits. You’re doing great.” 

“Thanks, Garth,” Lucifer said with a smile. 

“I just wish that you could cut him out completely,” Garth sighed. “It’s holding you back.” 

“You know why I can’t do that,” Lucifer sighed. 

“I do, and I hate it. But you’ll figure out a way, I know you will. You’re resourceful.” Garth smiled patiently. 

Lucifer nodded and sighed again. 

He couldn’t  _ wait  _ to be away from his ex, wholly and completely. 

It was the middle of the night when Lucifer awoke to the sound of glass breaking. 

“That better not have been one of my succulents or my roses,” he grumbled, locating a pocket knife. Despite Michael’s urging for him to get a gun and a concealed carry permit, he didn’t. Slowly, he undid the deadbolt and ventured out, ready to stab whomever had the  _ audacity  _ to break into his house. 

It didn’t take long to find the perpetrator, as he came face to face with an older man in a crisp white suit and who was now pointing a gun at his chest. 

“My little kitten, I think that this game has gone on long enough,” Asmodeus Prince hummed. “Three years is a very long time to be away from home, after all.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: @lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell
> 
> Twitter: @Alendra_Dragon
> 
> TikTok: @officerlucifer
> 
> Comments and Kudos are Shiny!!


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